A Shadow
by LollyLady
Summary: Years have passed since the war of the ring, and the King and Queen of Gondor are drifting apart. A story of love; and lack of it, passion and lack of it, but above all...a story of madness.
1. Chapter 1 Realisation

**CHAPTER 1 - REALISATION**

Arwen stared at her reflection in the shattered glass mirror, her thoughts drifting tirelessly back to Rivendell, back to the place where she had learned how to love. She put a slender hand through her dark hair and sighed, before bending down and picking up the various shards of objects that littered her beautiful bedroom. She had learnt to love in Rivendell, and now, inside the high walls of Minas Tirith... she was learning how to fall out of love, and learning, slowly but surely, that her father had been right; Gondor was no place for an elven princess.

"Arwen..."

She turned her pale face up to him, the tears which she wasn't even aware she was shedding fell down her cheeks. She sighed. "My Lord."

Formality was all she shared with Aragorn now, there was no tenderness, there was no love. She was a servant in her own household, and in her own bed, and she had lost the stubbornness which had made him love her. She had lost her fire, her hope, she had misplaced all her emotions the night that her father sailed to the Grey Havens.

Aragorn gazed at his wife, his lover, his queen and a bitter taste came to his mouth. He glanced over her head and out of the window, to a place where he was free of his title, free of his duties, free of everything, even his name if he bid it. She tried to make eye contact, grasping, groping, hanging on to the last bit of tenderness that she felt for him, for she knew that he was hurting, hurting so much, missing the outdoors so much and his friends, the little hobbits, especially Frodo.

At first she had hated that she couldn't even comfort him. He'd snap, shout at her, her words had seemed to irritate him. He'd tell her that she knew nothing of what had happened, and she had bowed her head, knowing he was right, but she had still hated that she couldn't make him smile. Now she didn't even try, it was useless, King Elessar wasn't the man she had fallen in love with, he was so cold, so empty, Aragorn's soul had died on the quest, and she resented everyone for that; because of the weakness of man, she had lost the love for hers.

A servant shouted outside, and both the King and the Queen of Gondor heaved a sigh of relief as the awkward, troubled silence passed and Aragorn, after casting a long, fleeting glance at Arwen, left the room, left her to her clearing up, left her to her tears.

And they came to her without fail, the realisation sinking in, the final tiny, unbroken shards of her heart breaking into thousands of pieces. They were never going to get it back.

-----

_"Oh Eowyn."_

The king glanced at his friend, noticing the tears falling down her pale cheeks as she looked at him square in the eyes for the first time in years. "I was scared to do that until now." She whispered, barely audibly. "I was scared to look into your eyes because I knew that if I did - no matter how I feel about Faramir - I would fall in love with you again." Aragorn looked at the floor, biting his lip, not knowing what to say and Eowyn smiled. "You've changed so much." She touched his cheek with her finger and he shivered involuntarily. "Since you came back..."-

"Thats what Arwen says."

Eowyn looked at her long slender fingers. "She's a good, strong woman Elessar."

"I've broken her heart. I know that now. I've pushed her and pushed her and now she's finally broken, she's a shadow of what she used to be." A single tear dropped down his cheek. "We've lost the butterflies Eowyn... will we ever get them back?"

"Faramir never gave me butterflies. He never needed to... He was just honest and open in a way that you will never be. If the only way you can love someone is by butterflies; then there's not much hope that they'll return,_ or_ that she'll stay...unless you_ do_ still love her," She put her arms around him. "and you don't."


	2. Chapter 2 Spotted

**_Thankies alot for my reviews!!!!! Love you all loads, and now...here goes chapter 2_**

**CHAPTER 2 - SPOTTED**

Faramir held the fine silk curtains ajar as his wife embraced the King, a pang of jealousy hitting him deep in the stomach, slowly at first, but hitting harder and harder until the man let go of the curtain and paced around the room, his heart sinking to the very pit of his body.

Looking tentatively at his wedding ring, he bit his lip and considered the situation. Eowyn has always loved him he thought slowly, And he always had only eyes for Arwen. Now the honeymoon period was over, the whole kingdom could see it; the King and Queen of Gondor hated one another with a passion - just the kind of passion that could make him fall for Eowyn, make the King, whom he had always loved and trusted - take his wife.

He opened the door to his chambers and called to a guard, when one came rushing, he gave orders and the guard fled away as quickly as he had appeared. It was all in hand.

----

Arwen watched from the window as her husband spoke to Eowyn, the hatred she felt as the two of them walked, laughed together, making her want to heave. She'd had enough, but she knew her rights, and she wasn't about to let some wandering horsewoman take her place on the throne. When Elessar entered the room later that night, she voiced, rather loudly, her opinions to him.

"Do you love her?" She raised her eyebrows.

"Excuse me?"

"Do you love her? Do you love Eowyn as you once loved me?My Lord." She screamed, pacing the room, her face red with anger.

Aragorn shook his head. "I don't have to listen to this."

"So are you just going to walk away then?" She shrugged. "Back into her arms? My god Aragorn, what the hell has happened to you? I used to be able to talk to you... You used to know exactly what I was thinking. So tell me Oh great Lord of Gondor...What the hell am I thinking now?!" When he didn't answer, she sat down on the bed, taking deep breaths before whispering, "I'm thinking "Where the hell do we go from here?" I'm thinking "What has happened to me and to the man I used to love?" I'm thinking "Can I do this anymore?" Now that's what I'm thinking."

"Nowhere...He's dead, gone...and...Probably not."

"Then why, if he's dead, do I sleep with him every night? He's not dead, I refuse to believe that the old Aragorn...that Strider is dead. You're just too much of a coward to be that man anymore."

"And you are too cold hearted to love the man I've become."

"Does Eowyn love you just the way you are? Oh how bloody romantic! It isn't a bed of roses being me you know! I gave up...everything for you...for Strider." She sobbed.

"Strider is dead."

----

"Why are you doing this?" the young woman sobbed as her husband looked at the floor. "I love you!"

He bit his lip to stop the tears from falling down his cheek before shaking his head. "But just remember this Eowyn...You'll always love him a hell of a lot more!"

"I never meant to..."-

Faramir put a finger to her lips and ran his other hand through his hair. "Its over Eowyn. It's gone. The love...gone. When I saw you with him...when I saw how you looked at him, it nearly killed me wife. Then I realised...he's the one who made you beautiful."

"No. That was you."


	3. Chapter 3 Thoughts

**CHAPTER 3 - THOUGHTS**

Faramir left the following morning, Eowyn's bitter glance watching him until she could no longer see him anymore through the misted up windows of her chambers. She was scared. Was the room even her's anymore? Did she even have a home? Faramir had left, taking everything he owned with him, to search for relatives far away from Minas Tirith. "Far away," He had said "from you."

She pulled a comb through her fair hair, all the time thinking of Aragorn, Elessar... her King. All the time her mind wandering on his deep, deep eyes and the way he had held her the night before. He didn't love Arwen anymore, and the elven princess despised him, as any woman would, he had robbed her of her life, her freedom... he had promised her the world, and never delivered, and Eowyn understood her pain, she understood how hard to must be to be torn between what your heart is wants, and what your body needs.

But she also wanted Aragorn... and nothing, as the Witchking had witnessed, stood in the way of the princess of Rohan... and the thing she wanted most.

----

Arwen's body needed Gondor. There was no secret about that, and whilst she slept in a single bed for the first time in years, she realised why. _She was childish_. She couldn't live without Gondor because Gondor was her's by right. She couldn't turn her back on Gondor...because that would mean that he would win... Elessar and Eowyn would rule together, she knew that for a cert - even more so now when she had witnessed Faramir riding away without explanation - and she couldn't let that happen...her body wouldn't let her walk away from Gondor.

But her heart ached for her father. Her heart ached for the magic and wonder of her own people, and in her heart she wanted so bad to let him go, let herself - and Aragorn - be happy. Her mind though...would never allow it.

----

Aragorn sighed and brushed his hands across his face, feeling the prickle of the stubble lining it. He was confused, his head fuzzy from the feelings, and lack of feelings he was feeling!(hahaha) He had never allowed himself to get so close to loving Eowyn before now. There was something there, something less momentous than the what he had felt for Arwen, but it was still there, and it had always been - eversince the day he first laid eyes on her - as different as Arwen as humanly (or elfly) possible...but somehow, just as important.

Arwen had always confused him. Since he'd met her, she'd thrown him mixed signals, declaring her love and then taking it back, but he believed truly, that they were soulmates and always had been, and nothing...not even ack of love, feelings or butterflies, would convince him otherwise.

----

Faramir rode and rode until he wasn't even aware what direction he was following anymore, not that he cared - his heart was cold.

Eowyn had mystified, and paralysed him from the start, filling his senses purely and completely, and slowly rebuilding the broken man he had become into something more useful. He smiled slowly, not really knowing why, only knowing that it was all he could do to stop from crying. He had seen it in her eyes long before he had really known it, when Aragorn entered the room, she slowed or quietened to look at him, and Faramir was let dumbfounded.

If he had stayed, she would only have hurt him more.


	4. For all you reviewers

For all you loyal readers: Without really giving away the plotline I cannot tell you more than this - It is a complex story of Eowyn's love of a man she can never have, Arwen's unfounded jealousy of everyone around her and Aragorns lack of self control and decisiveness and his need for something familiar. It is a story of love, and the lack of it, it is a story of passion, and the lack of it, but above all, it is a story of madness. mwahahahahaha!

Good enough for ya'll?! :)


	5. Chapter 4 Battles

**CHAPTER 4 - BATTLES**

Arwen's eyes glazed over as her husband walked in through the darkened door of their chamber and undressed, sliding into bed beside her without a word and she hated him for it. She hated him for never being strong enough, or confrontational enough to speak first.

"Elessar..." She whispered, summoning every inch of warmth that she had in her body, to say that one name. "Elessar, my lord." He turned to her, his old, wisened eyes resting upon her face, glowing in the palely lit room and as the tears flowed from her own eyes, he felt the growing sensation to hold her; to wipe away her tears, if not as her lover and her husband; then as her best friend. "I feel trapped here Elessar. Trapped in my own kingdom. Driven to madness as I watch you fade away from being the man I fell in love with. Driven to depression and needing so badly; my brothers and my father."

He bit his lip. She wanted him to reassure her. She wanted him to tell her that everything would be OK. "You may leave if you feel that way."

Arwen turned away from him. "And to what? Where would I go Aragorn? Mirkwood? Rivendell? Where do I have to turn if not here?"

Elessar shook his head.

"I know why you want my absence. You think I am blind and stupid King, yet I see it in your eyes. You want me gone so _she _can be Queen!"

"Oh, so we are back to this?"

"Of course we are! You want me out of the way so you and Eowyn can be free to want one another. Faramir left because of you Aragorn. You lost the best captain this city has ever seen, and do you know why? Because he saw the way she looked at you. He saw the seduction and the lies that glazed her pretty blue eyes, and do you know what? I saw it too. I saw the way she looked at you and I hated it."

"Why did you hate it Arwen? We feel no butterflies, we share no love. We share our bitterness and our greed but that is all."

"I hated it, because no matter how much you hurt me, and how much you try to push me away; this is _my _kingdom as much as it is your's. These are _my _people as much as they are your's. I can't help but hate it because some part of me, even if it is in the smallest, most remote part of my brain - still loves you. Will _always _love you. Can't you see that?"

"Do you know what I see every time I look at you? Do you know how hard it is, when everytime I touch you - I see what might have been?" Aragorn sighed and she lifted her chin up and looked into his eyes.

"What might have been never was Elessar... we drifted apart, we let things get in the way of us being together. Frodo may have saved middle earth, but he didn't save it for me, for us, did he?"

The king hung his head in the darkness and his eyes filled up with tears. "It wasn't up to Frodo to save us Arwen. It was up to me to save you, and up to you..." he leaned towards her and brushed her cheek with his fingertips, "to save me."

She flinched away from his words and his touch and sighed. "Maybe I should have gone into the west with my father, Maybe this is all _my _fault."

"Shh." he placed his finger on her lips and kissed her.

They lay together that night, crying, talking, making love, each hating every awkward second of it, Aragorn crying silently as he wished and prayed for butterflies, and Arwen quietly smug, content that even if this was only round one, she had the upper hand over Eowyn.

* * *

"Did you get the butterflies back?" 

Aragorn lifted his head as Eowyn swept into the room, feeling and seeing her icy mood chill him to the bone. "What is this Eowyn?"

"I have sources who say you spent the night with Arwen."

"She is my wife, and your Queen Lady Eowyn...Address her, and me, by our titles."

She narrowed her eyes and flicked her fair hair from her face. "Yes. As you wish..._Your Majesty_."

Aragorn faced her, he knew what she was trying to do, Arwen and Faramir had been right about her, she was vindictive, she wanted the throne yet still the King of Gondor was intrigued and she saw it. She saw his hesitance and she smiled, gliding forwards to kiss his hands.

"You will come to me tonight?" She asked innocently, looking deeply into his eyes.

He nodded before he knew what he was doing, and a split second later; she was gone.


	6. Chapter 5 Visits

**CHAPTER 5 - VISITS**

"Arwen?"

The young queen turned from her path at the sound of her name, and stared in open mouthed wonder at the sight which held her gaze. Smiling genuinely for the first time in weeks she walked towards her old friend and bowed her head. "Hello Legolas. Its been far too long."

The Prince of Mirkwood smiled, bewildered at Arwen's formality and pulled her into a deep hug that took her breath away. She felt his power and his magic ripple through her body. "You have not changed one bit." he pulled away from her. "Where is Aragorn?"

Arwen let out a harsh laugh. "He no longer walks the gardens with me."

Legolas looked into her bottomless eyes and felt her pain like a knife to the stomach. He had always loved and respected the young Rivendell princess, if only from afar. She would never had let her feelings show if he had arrived sooner, A week agao, she was composed. A week ago Legolas wouldn't have found her wandering the gardens alone. A week ago, she was far from happy, but not threatened at least. Not scared. "What are you afraid of?"

Arwen looked up, snapping her mind shut. "Afraid of? I'm afraid of being cast out of this place. I'm afraid of the past, the present, but most of all, I'm afraid of the future. My future. Gondor's future. I'm scared because we have lost each other and, in my ill feeling, I am scared that I have let you delve too far into my thoughts." She raised her eyebrows. "My private thoughts."

He bit down hard on his lip and glanced at her apologetically. "What do you mean you have lost each other?"

"I mean, my dear prince, that there is no longer love within these walls."

"He no longer loves you?" Legolas asked, not quite believing it.

"We are no longer in love."

"Then why stay? Why not leave this place tomorrow?"

Arwen smiled a sad, lonely smile that held no happiness. "My childishness. My greed, my selfishness wont allow it."

* * *

Aservant bustled into the Kings chambers with a message that Legolas of Mirkwood had arrived, but found the room empty; and upon council with others, he set off briskly towards the Lady Eowyn's chambers, rubbing his head in heretic thinking, but that room was empty also, and just as he was beginning to run out of ideas, he heard angry whispers in the next corridor along.

"So you lied to me?"

"I'm married Eowyn,"

"You LIED to me?"

The servant rounded the corner and greeted the King with a bow, telling him of the message he was sent with, and walking away.

"Legolas."

Legolas smiled broadly and spun around, only to be roughly embraced by his friend. "Elessar." he bowed his head. "How are things going at this side of Middle earth? I saw Faramir but a day ago." he added looking at his friend deeply.

"And what situation did he tell?"

"He said quite frankly that thing weren't right for him here. He said that it had something to do with the Lady..." he caught a glimpse of her by the door. "and you."

"Then he was mistaken."

"There is no situation there?" Legolas asked, knowing the answer.

"No."

"Then why the hell are you lying to me?"

* * *

"Eowyn."

"Lady Arwen." She bowed her head.

Arwen moved to take hold of Eowyn's wrists, "Lets cut the crap Eowyn. I will not be forced from my home. I will not be cast off my own lands, and you will never...never be Queen of Gondor...Got that?" Her grip tightened. "Stay away from my husband or so help you God."

Eowyn pulled away and rubbed her reddening wrists. "No wonder he doesn't love you anymore."

Arwen turned around and smiled. "This is no more longer about love Eowyn. This is about stability. This is about pride."


End file.
